How Spacetime Helped Me Reclaim My Mental Health — And How It Can Help You Too
This Mental Health Awareness Month, I want to share something that changed how I think, how I breathe, and how I heal.
It’s called Spacetime.
Now I know — that might sound like a science word from physics or some big university lecture. But I promise you — it’s something you already feel every single day. And it may just be the key to helping us take better care of ourselves, especially as Black women. Let me start by explaining Time and Space.
We Don’t All Experience Time the Same Way
Have you ever noticed how time feels slow when you’re sad…
Or how it races when you’re overwhelmed?
Or how you sit in one place, but your mind is everywhere — past regrets, future worries?
That’s what Spacetime helps us understand.
Spacetime says that time and space are not separate.
They bend, stretch, and feel different depending on what’s happening in our bodies, minds, and hearts.
That’s why, during my breast cancer diagnosis at age 74 — in the middle of the COVID pandemic — I felt like the clock didn’t make sense anymore. I was stuck in fear. Nothing felt normal. Everything was out of place. But then something powerful happened…
That fear I felt? It transformed into meaning.
I realized I didn’t have to rush to feel better. I didn’t have to “be strong” every moment.
I could just move… slowly… in my own rhythm… through my own Spacetime.
That moment — when I stopped fighting time and started listening to it — was the beginning of my healing.
And that’s why I created my YouTube Trilogy on Time, Space, and Spacetime.
Understanding Space: The Invisible Weight We Carry
Let’s take a moment to talk about space — not outer space, not NASA, but the space we live in every day. May times you hear people say “My Space”, or “This Space”, etc.
Space is more than just a location. It’s more than the rooms we clean or the streets we walk. Space is emotional. It’s psychological. It’s ancestral. More elaborately,
It’s:
– The corner of the couch where you finally exhale after holding it together all day.
– The feeling of entering a doctor’s office and wondering, Will they listen to me?
– The stretch of silence between you and someone you love, when words can’t reach.
– The neighborhood you grew up in — or the church that raised you — or the hospital room where everything changed.
Space is how we hold ourselves. Space is how we’re held by the world — or not. For us Black Women, Space Often Feels Complicated
We move through spaces where we’re expected to show up as “strong,” even when we’re exhausted. We shrink ourselves to fit rooms not built for us. We expand ourselves to carry others. We smile in spaces that don’t always feel safe.
Sometimes, we don’t even feel like we have space — to cry, to breathe, to just be.
That is why reclaiming space — mentally, emotionally, culturally — is radical self-care.
What Happens When We Connect Time and Space?
Once we understand time is flexible…
And space is personal…
We begin to see that they were never separate at all.
And that brings us to Spacetime.
Spacetime isn’t just a scientific discovery.
It’s a metaphor for how we move, how we heal, and how we find meaning — not by rushing through life, but by noticing how life moves through us.
It’s the realization that we don’t have to be in a hurry.
We don’t have to be everywhere at once.
We don’t have to pretend that our lives fit into narrow spaces or rigid timelines.
We are allowed to stretch.
We are allowed to pause.
We are allowed to heal — in our own Spacetime.
What You Can Watch — and Why It Matters
Here’s what each episode explores:
– Episode 1: There Is No Now
I talk about how the idea of a fixed “now” is an illusion — and how being present doesn’t mean being perfect.
– Episode 2: Here Is No Where
I explore how “place” is not just physical — it’s emotional, spiritual. You can be somewhere and feel nowhere.
– Episode 3: The Interwoven Reality
I tie it all together — how Spacetime is not just physics, but a tool for healing, especially for mental health.
Why This Matters for Black Women
Many of us are carrying so much:
– Generations of responsibility
– Unspoken trauma
– Pressure to always “keep it together”
But what if we didn’t have to?
What if Spacetime gave us permission to pause, to breathe, and to just be — without guilt?
That’s the invitation I offer.
You don’t have to understand Einstein, who taught us about Spacetime. You just have to understand yourself. And Spacetime can help you do that.
Final Words:
Fear is real. I’ve felt it.
But I also know — it can transform.
And when it does, it can lead to something beautiful: meaning, self-care, and liberation.
Let’s not rush to heal.
Let’s expand into healing — together.
With love and spaciousness,
Egondu Onyejekwe
NCNW-CSO Sister | Breast Cancer Survivor | Time Traveler
YouTube Trilogy:
There Is No Now: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EXAMPLE1
Here Is No Where: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EXAMPLE2
The Interwoven Reality (Spacetime): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EXAMPLE3
